Storytime Recently, I shared a link to my blog with an acquaintance. At first this was just a passing, “Oh I wrote a blog post about that.” Meaning, I didn’t think to worry about being judged. However, within a few days anxiety started to creep {read more}
Here we are, May 2021. All things considered, how is the speed of this year going compared to last? For me, this year seems to be going much faster. Perhaps this is due to becoming more used to working from home and gradually less unknowns. {read more}
When is the last time you experienced something new? Take a second and really think on it. Potentially as simple as ordering something new from your favorite restaurant, or as big as a new hobby. Or, maybe it has been years since you’ve veered from your personal normal. Either way, try and determine the last time you tried something new or were a beginner at something. Remember, there is benefit in consistency. However, experiencing new things is important for our growth and overall happiness in life.
Recently I found myself slipping into a ‘just get through it’ attitude. With a false sense that everyday would be the same – mostly due to life during the pandemic – I watched as time marched on but I never felt anything different. You may agree that this feeling is somewhat comforting, however also a bit disturbing. Expecting everyday to be like the last doesn’t allow us to fully use our senses and can begin to feel rather awful.
My tendency is to need to consistently experience new things and try new hobbies. Not to mention, have an ever changing schedule. An alarm went off in me, realizing each week of the month was relatively the same. After a few moments of reflection, it occurred to me I needed to change something. Instinct told me this was a larger need than changing a meal or working out at a different time in the day.
So, I sat down to determine my last newbie moment. Perhaps it is okay to blame it on the pandemic, perhaps not. However, the last time I had done anything new was too long ago to remember. Many things had been on my hopeful 2020 list. Trips, food, excursions, life moments… so many things that completely paused. A less optimistic 2021 list didn’t include any new activities. Instead, only included improving on or repeating previous hobbies. In addition, more simple self-care related activities – sweet but not new!
It is interesting to me how things that once were new become common place. Things we never thought we’d accomplish or experience and there we are, doing them for the 3rd time that week. For example, I remember when I brought Bianca home for the first time. And now, it would be strange not to take her for walks multiple times a day. Her adorableness still gets me everyday though.
Trying new things can help us in so many ways. Some that come to mind are:
Asking for help is something I’ve never been good at. Over the course of many years, it is something I’ve realized I needed to improve on. Today for example, an awesome friend came over to help with a home project I’ve been wanting done for {read more}
Hello everyone! Today’s post is a bit different. Instead of a traditional blog post, I am launching my first products. And hosting the FIRST giveaway! Que the YAY here. The occasion, you ask?! Mother’s Day! This year, in the United States, Mother’s Day is on {read more}
Before we get started with today’s post: yes, I’m an extrovert :). I can also be a little extra. And lastly, in the past 15 years, I’ve never met a stranger 🙂
Have you seen the famous quote by Maya Angelou:
People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But, people will never forget how you made them feel.
Maya Angelou
Recognizing that this is controversial to some who study psychology. Because technically you can’t make anyone feel a certain way. This quote still rings true in my opinion. While we can’t guarantee someone will understand or see our intentions; we can do our best to express intent. It would be a rare person who can let every interaction, no matter how extreme, just roll of their back. Plus, I honestly don’t know how healthy that would be. Not to mention, being thoughtful and treating others with kindness can change another person’s entire day.
As we go into any situation, it is up to us to be respectful, kind and present. Regardless, if it be with a stranger or someone we know well. Yes, sometimes we may be in a massive rush. Perhaps we’ve got our own ‘stuff’ going on. But to truly stop and ‘see’ the other person and hold space, is the most noble thing you can do. Even if the interaction is fleeting, in line at a drive through, the exchange can be not just pleasant but deeply human.
When I first moved down to the southern part of the United States, this was a struggle for me. Having been ‘trained up’ to be overly results oriented and reduce any emotion to zero; it was difficult for me to understand why people would want me to even make eye contact. Let alone, slow down long enough to exchange pleasantries. Remember the post where I talked about the t-shirt that says, “I’m not angry, I’m from Philly”?
In a specific example, a now amazing and dear friend of mine would pass by my cubicle each morning. And she’d ask, “Are you doing okay?” Leave it to this northerner to take offense. Thinking she was implying I wasn’t okay or that something seemed amiss. It wasn’t until years later, we would laugh about this. Years of her pouring into our friendship, listening to me and even letting me borrow her own mom for advice. Now, this seems so hilarious to me, but also looking back, kind of sad!
It also makes me realize that many people are walking around in a broken place and don’t even realize it. It is safe to say that my extreme cold demeanor and less than pleasant resting face, reflected something going on internally.
With a need for more than one pair of sunglasses, and more months with less layers, life was simply better. Being outside is my preference, and being social outside is even better. The opportunities to do so were vast in this world of Carolina blue skies. During the first few years of being in the South, not only did I experience a massive amount of sunshine, but I also became warmer.
Some think that southerners aren’t genuine. Granted, I can only speak from my experience, which has shown me that if someone asks how you are doing, they truly do want to know. In some cases, it might be for gossip (haha), but in most cases, its out of real concern. Gradually realizing how freeing it was to open up, about the tough stuff, and the happy stuff too!
Celebrating with and comforting others is what this life is all about.
– An extrovert who has never met a stranger
The general concern for other’s well-being exists in almost every interaction here. With close friends of course the topics are deeper and more vulnerable. With cashiers and the public, it is likely with enough interactions you’ll get to know them!
Over time many strangers have become friends – sometimes the person sitting next to me in the airport. And other times the college student ringing up my groceries.
Going back to Maya Angelou’s quote, in my mind this means to walk around authentically. It doesn’t necessarily mean smiling at others 24/7 or playing ‘walking on sunshine’ endlessly through your mind. I do think simply being genuine and paying attention makes the world of difference. “Seeing” another person by hearing what isn’t obvious and responding thoughtfully. Being available for another to just sit and talk. Listening without comment. Celebrating along side another, or walking into chaos with them. Taking responsibility for our own behavior within the context of the situation. We might not always say or do the right thing, but being genuine and thoughtful goes a long way.
Sometimes, after a long period of burn out, we loose motivation. Often, we see that coming. However, other times, the lack of motivation feels like it comes out of no where. In either case, this feeling can be quite unsettling. Especially for those who are {read more}
At one point or another, the majority of people find themselves in a situation they wish they weren’t in. Usually, this happens after a series of small decisions that slowly took the person off course. Rarely are these situations purposeful or an all-of-a-sudden type moment. {read more}
Today’s post is a bit different than most. In brief, it is a reflection exercise. Most likely, this should be done individually or in discussion with a loved one. It may be helpful to have old journals, phone notes or pictures within reach.
Think back 5 years from today. For those reading on the day this is published, that would be Friday, April 8th, 2016. If it wasn’t for ‘on this day’ reminders from our social media platforms, would you remember what you were doing? Do you think back and realize how far you’ve come? How much of what you were doing around that time, has now become second nature? What characteristics of yourself were you only considering developing at that time and now have?
Funny enough, during this time I was on a social media ‘pause’. However, based on my google calendar, this weekend was the Atlantic City Beer and Wine Fest which I was considering attending. As it turns out, I did not attend as hoped. But instead, had a work trip to Nashville to prepare for. My entire life was in such a different place compared to current state. Memory tells me that I was wanting to have every second of every day packed with activities. In addition, I was in the process of finding a different place to live. Honestly, being on the move was a huge comfort at that time. Based on phone pictures, I had flown with work friends to do a leadership seminar with me. Ah, how some things change and other just keep getting better!
Okay, after that, potentially long walk down memory lane, it is time to realize how far you’ve come. And yes, believe me, I know there might be so much further to go, and that’s a good thing! (This blog would not exist if it wasn’t for the fact I want to improve and inspire others to improve every single day).
However, there is a time and a place to give yourself credit. And consider this permission to make that time NOW! That being said, as the northern hemisphere comes out of the winter season and transitions to the Spring season, there is no better time than NOW to give yourself the credit. Allow yourself the moment to truly consider your accomplishments, your growth, any elimination of bad habits and establishment of new ones! After all, when is the last time you gave yourself a round of applause?
Today is just that short and sweet. Realizing, that it my be emotional to go back to Spring of 2016 and remember all the things. In order to keep things simple, I’m purposely not adding additional stories or thoughts of my own.
Much love, xoxo
Rose & Bianca
That dreaded feeling Do you ever find yourself asking, “What should I do now?” Potentially this question flashes before you at an unexpected dead-end in the road, and others it comes a ‘real-life’ dead-end. Sometimes, long-time-coming or completely unexpected, this feeling isn’t normally a good {read more}