#home Philly will ALWAYS be home. Somewhere between Old City and Fairmount Park I left my heart all those years ago. When I first moved away from Philadelphia in 2006, I returned often. Each return trip, on the descent over the Delaware River, my heart {read more}
The simple. One of my favorite and most simple ways to make my day feel ‘different’ comes from something a good friend taught me! This friend happened to be a college roommate too and is one of the bravest people I know. A few years {read more}
I vividly remember sitting at my computer, looking out at my amazing view and thinking to myself, ‘the possibilities in life are endless… I want to do it all.’ It wasn’t for another decade that I would truly believe I could “do it all.” And almost another decade later, I can say I still haven’t done it all!
On that day in 2003, looking out the window of my 22nd floor apartment, my heart knew that the possibilities were endless. Excitement welled up in me as I thought of all the things I wanted to do and experience. (Maybe it was because I could LITERALLY see the Rocky Steps from my apartment?)
As more thoughts filled my mind, and my smile grew wider, all of a sudden the logic in me came down like a brick. My mind and heart were NOT on the same page. The more my heart was yearning to go go go, the more my mind would pop-up and say ‘how? how? how?’
Not about to let anything, or anyone (including myself) stop the momentum, I opened Amazon and searched for a book to help me. (This was around the time Amazon was primarily an online book store only!) Within a few minutes of searching, I saw a book with the title, “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway.”
Somehow JUST the title allowed me to overcome my worries, tell my logical mind to calm down and tap into my heart dreams!
Full disclosure: I have NEVER read this book, even to this day! I actually never even bought it. Below is a picture of it next to two other books I have on my Amazon Wish List. Sometimes when my logical mind starts going – I just go look at this on my wish list and remind myself of 2003 me.
After that simple defining moment, I can say with confidence, that very rarely do I actually feel fear. Even when unfortunate events happen after the fact, I do not have that inner feelings of being scared. For example, most of you know getting on stage is one of my true loves in life (my current largest audience size is 3,000 people!). Not to mention, my eager willingness to get on a 1,200 lb animal and ride around – bareback or not! In addition, I have ridden through the Swiss Alps and the Blue Ridge Mountains on the back of a motorcycle. I’ve traveled countless times outside the country on my own (once I even ran into my Aunt Bea in the Dublin airport which wasn’t planned!) All that to say, I’m ready when you are! Let’s GO! 😉
Disclaimer: My lack of fear has gotten me into a handful of unfortunate situations (and a few concussions) – sometimes I wish my instincts would kick in a bit harder – but that is a story for a different day! 
There are at least two more big dreams I have for my life and countless experiences on my bucket list. Recently, I’ve realized just what was holding me back from even going after those dreams! The answer: FEAR.
The pandemic has undoubtedly affected each and everyone of us in different ways and to different degrees. Based on conversations with dear friends and family, for the large majority the uncertainty has brought some form of fear and the resulting anxiety.
Because of the current situation the fear is rational. The uncertainty experienced right now is not from our inner critic asking, “How?” or, “What if?”. All the while, life is continuing to move forward and time is passing. Personally, not being used the feeling of being held back by fear, I have found myself in a spiral of anxiety. This is not my normal self and I know it, therefore there is a need to be deliberate allowing my typical calm, confidence take back over!
If you’ve ever been to a local park with a pond, you may have noticed the signs saying, “Please, don’t feed the ducks.” Feeding the ducks is bad for one main reason (and many others, see this link):
1. They will fill up on ‘people’ food and not get the nutrients they need It makes them sick and can cause deformities, making them unable to fly (and thus migrate).
Similarly, we should not be feeding our own fears. Just like the ducks having too much ‘people’ food, if we feed our fears and fill up on doubt, there is no room for healthy, happy, affirming thoughts we need!
Because anxiety and fear are at an all time high due to the circumstances of the world, it is even more important to start taking action. Set aside the unknowns for a moment, and go back to your vision board or goals. Take a moment to remind yourself of the ‘why’ (the purpose of your goal). Allow yourself the treat of day dreaming of the moment your goal becomes a reality!
Step 1. Identify how long your top goals have been on your list.
Step 2. Putting aside the pandemic, list out 2 obstacles to each of the goals.
Step 3. Give yourself ten minutes per goal to research possible solutions to those obstacles.
As a firm believer in research and a grateful ‘google-er’, the simple act of looking for solutions can instantly remove a tiny bit of fear. Using YouTube to learn about someone else’s experience can be even more helpful. However, true empowerment comes when you personally take action. Maybe its making a phone call, updating your resume or buying a domain name. No matter the ‘step’ toward your goal, taking it leads to empowerment!
If (and when) fear pops up again… talk to it like it is your main competitor. When fear asks, “What if you fail?” Look it right in the eye and reply, “What if I succeed?”.
From the book, “Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway” by Susan Jeffers, Ph.D.:
The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and…do it!
When you do it often enough, you will no longer be afraid in that particular situation…
In this post, we discuss prioritization and focus. Separately or together, these two tools can reduce stress, increase the feeling of accomplishment and improve personal success rates. It may be helpful to have a piece of paper or journal to write down your thoughts. {read more}
Can you think of one instance in which a second chance would have been great? An interview? A relationship? A career choice? Thinking about these moments, name the top three things you would change before going into the second chance. Preparedness? Deodorant? Self-reflection? Word choice? {read more}
Yesterday, I welcomed the happy distraction of watching Super Bowl LV. The 20-21 football season was especially strange. For instance, the players have been under such different circumstances. In addition, games have been cancelled due to positive COVID tests. Most interesting (imo), stadiums have been much quieter creating a whole different playing environment. This year, even the advertisements were different.
My knowledge of football is fairly limited but I do appreciate all sports! For example, the basic rules of the game make sense to me. Some of the current players sound familiar. That being said, I’ve never had a team I felt I could connect with. Perhaps this is because every hard hit or potential injury has me worried as though the player is my own child? Either way I appreciate the game and the athleticism it takes to even play, let alone win.
While watching last nights game, I thought to myself, “Is this even the Super Bowl?!” It seemed to me that Kanas City didn’t even show up?!
Learning about each team and reading through the interesting rumor-mill, I found in general most opinions deemed Kanas City players arrogant and overly confident. While the Buccs were considered to be the underdog and more humble but also ready to win.
During the game, I asked, “What makes Tom Brady so special, what is his deal?” My friend replied immediately, “He isn’t even that great an athlete, he is just really smart and knows strategy.”
After the final result was official, I did some research on Brady and found that he attributes much of his success to his lovely wife, Gisele. Gisele has been reported to influence her husband to do pre-game rituals. Brady reports that Gisele has helped him focus on the ‘power of intention’ and ‘believing that things are really going to happen.
The more I read about Tom Brady, a theme certainly popped out – he is EXTREMELY consistent. His schedule and habits are health centered and focused on keeping his body in prime condition. Not only does his consistency surround keeping his physical body in proper condition, but his desire and drive to win have not waned.
His drive to win keeps him down a narrow road of meticulous habits: a strict diet, measured family time and meditation. Brady gathers knowledge and finds the best way to apply it to his life. Some of the articles I read called it an ‘obsession’, I would call it WISE.
Often I can be heard joking that I too am a G.O.A.T (greatest of all time). Partially because my birthday falls into the Capricorn astrological sign, but mostly because I strive to be the very best I can. Over time, I have also been called out for being ‘obsessed’, ‘picky’, ‘annoying’, and ‘meticulous’ over the food I choose to eat or the products I use.
What I learned from reading about Brady is that being this aware of what works for yourself and applying those learnings IS what it takes to START the journey of being great. Followed by consistency and follow-through, adjustments where necessary and the humble awareness that the work still has to be put in. In addition, the credit he gives to his wife and family should be recognized! And lastly, his listening to his wife about intention setting and ‘willing’ the outcome.
With these four things, it comes as no surprise this GOAT brought his new team a Super Bowl win!
Truly taking the time to learn what is happening with your specific body, mind or situation and adjusting your life with these learnings is the foundation. Knowing that what works for even 90% up the population may not be the right fit for you. Remember the post on being fueled and aflame? If you aren’t feeling your best, figure out why!
Once you have figured out what works for you, DO IT and do it regularly. Set principles to live your life on, set a schedule or a yes/no on certain foods and do not veer from those choices.
This step is so important and one I see many either want to skip, thinking if all the other steps are completed, magically they will see improvements. At its most simple this concept is fairly obvious: if you want to lift more weight at the gym, practice is necessary. Going and actually doing will be required for improvements and greatness!
It really stood out to me how much Brady commented about listening to his wife. She clearly has her husbands best interest and success in mind. His desire and willingness to listen to her regarding intention setting elated me! Perhaps you do not yet have a support system or family members you feel are rooting for you. Instead show up for yourself. Set your intentions for your goals, your work, your day!
Would love to hear from you in the comments! Did you watch the super bowl? Are you a Brady fan? Was the outcome what you were expecting?
Squirrel A lesson in self-realization and the need to embrace perceived flaws. There is only one person in my life whom, I can heartily say, can be as easily distracted as me. The realization of my distracted tendency came only after I met this person. They {read more}
Happy February 1st! Are you excited to embark on the second month of 2021, fresh faced and bright eyed?! This weekend I wrote out February goals and revisited my 2021 kick-off. After making changes to my vision board, I’ve found there a benefit to make {read more}